40 Years of Lies & Truth

My father died 40 years ago when I had just turned 1. I grew up with 2 brothers in my house and 1 brother I sometimes heard about I never knew. 

I always heard my dad was a monster and his family was bad to be around but I still wanted to know them. My mom kept me from knowing them my whole life until recently when I finally met my brother. I can't even explain here how frustrating my search has been. I'm 41 now and I'm pissed off but thankful that now I can see him and hear his voice. We have so much in common and it's comforting. 

I now need couseling just from finding out so much that my mother didn't tell me but it's cool. YAH has brought me this far and I'll go further just having faith that old wounds will be healed. I'll never trust the people that lied to me and kept the truth from me. 

My aunt and my brother have been looking for me all this time...40 years. My aunt Sherrie told me to take on the new year and live it. Forgive the past and embrace my new family more than ever because outside of my faith my husband, kids, and my dad's family is all I have now.

I don't hate anyone at all, not mad anymore. For the first time ever I don't want to hurt myself anymore because I was always wanted. To my aunt and my brother I was not a mistake and that's all that matters to me now.

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